Archive for the ‘Features’ Category

Hugh Hefner for President

February 13th, 2016 No comments

hhforpresRumors of Michael Bloomberg considering a run for the presidency has been reported by the New York Times on January 23. We are pleased to announce here at the NIP that Hugh Hefner is throwing his hat into the ring. We reached out to his campaign spokesman, girlfriend Holly Madison and asked what persuaded Hef to jump in:

When Hef heard that Mike [Bloomberg, ed.] was considering running, Hef decided it was Hef’s patriotic duty to run as a third party candidate. After all, Hef set the stage for the Lewinsky scandal with his influential Playboy Philosophy he published back in the 60’s. His pollsters indicate he has now better brand recognition than Trump. It also will give him something new to write about since Playboy has abandoned nudity.

We wish Hef well and hope that our NIP readers will help spread the word.

Categories: Satire Tags:

Obama Awards National Voting Machine Contract to VW

November 3rd, 2015 No comments

obama_merkel_vwToday the Whitehouse announced awarding a national voting machine contract to Volkswagen. Citing recent news articles, Obama is quoted as saying, “We are excited to award this contract to VW engineers who have proven their superior programming skills.”

Analysts wonder at the timing of this announcement. Today’s upset in Kentucky may be telling. Today’s election in Kentucky resulted in Matt Bevin becoming the first republican to become governor in Kentucky in 40 years. Analysts wonder if that stinging loss and others this election day had anything to do with the Obama administration reaching out to VW.

When spokesman Josh Earnest was asked if today’s election losses had anything to do with awarding the contract to VW he replied, “VW has proven their superior programming skills which we feel will help our country bring about social justice at the polling booth.”

Categories: Big Government, Satire Tags: , ,

Associated Press Fact Check Refutes Obama’s Prevarication

March 29th, 2011 No comments

Highlights from the AP fact check of last night’s speech reveal Obama’s proclivity for exaggeration and self-aggrandizement:

OBAMA: We are turning the operation over to NATO.

FACT: The US is NATO, so we are turning the operation back over to ourselves.

OBAMA: “Our military mission is narrowly focused on saving lives.”

FACT: The operation is expanding militarily in an effort to unseat Gadhafi.

OBAMA: Seeking to justify the operation, he asserted this mission was vital to the national interest of the US.

FACT: Obama contradicted his own defense secretary, Robert Gates, who said the crisis “was not a vital national interest to the United States.”

OBAMA: “And tonight, I can report that we have stopped Gadhafi’s deadly advance.”

FACT: The regime continues to push back the rebels.

OBAMA: “Some nations may be able to turn a blind eye to atrocities in other countries. The United States of America is different.”

FACT: Obama turned a blind eye to the uprising in Iran, the killings of Jewish innocents, and the genocide in Darfur.

Maybe you can explain the strategy behind Obama’s lies. Let us know if you have figured it out. Read more at the AP fact check.

Nancy Pelosi 2010 Prevaricator of the Year™

January 1st, 2011 No comments

WASHINGTON: The NIP congratulates Nancy Pelosi, former Speaker of the House on winning the 2010 Prevaricator of the Year™. Following the 2009 winner Barack Obama is no small feat. We wish Nancy the very best and may she enjoy all the benefits that come with this award.

Nominations for 2010 Prevaricator of the Year™

December 1st, 2010 No comments

Obama 2009 Winner Prevaricator of the Year™

WASHINGTON: Today the National Institute of Prevarication officially opened nominations for the 2010 Prevaricator of the Year™. Nominations will remain open until midnight December 31st. The official results will be announced sometime in January 2011.

Nominations are open to anyone, and you can nominate yours truly, or yourself if you wish. Multiple nominations for the same person (from different sources) will carry weight in determining final results. You can nominate your favorite prevaricator by leaving a comment on this post with his or her name. To advance your nomination it would be helpful in describing your nominee’s contribution to the field of prevarication, citing sources where possible.

News of this award has already leaked and we have heard from many who want to be named Prevaricator of the Year™ for previous years. So we will also accept nominations for Posthumorous Prevaricator of the Year™. If you nominate someone for a Posthumorous award, be sure to include the year.

Once awards have been announced for a particular year, all decisions are final.

2009 Winner: Barack Hussein Obama

Editor’s Note: Results of Posthumorous awards are tabulated here:

Posthumorous awards:

1999 Al Gore for his work in creating the Internet

1998 Bill Clinton “It depends on what the meaning of ‘is’ is.”

1994 Jimmy Carter for achieving Korean nuclear disarmament, truce with Haiti

Note to the Carter Center: Nominations for multiple years are discouraged.

Categories: Prevaricator of the Year™ Tags:

King Street Patriots Fight Voter Fraud Nationally

November 1st, 2010 No comments

Babe HuggettBABE HUGGETT (Reporting from Houston): Lost in all the liberal-left/media smear machine tactics aimed at Houston’s King Street Patriots for uncovering blatant Democratic Party voter fraud within minority communities in Harris County is the fact that the King Street Patriots developed an initiative called True the Vote dedicated to ensuring that elections are free and fair.

True the Vote’s initiative game plan is to get concerned citizens actively involved in the election process to combat voter fraud. While fraudulent votes are a main worry anywhere, unwatched polls, corrupted judges and clerks are also a main, but underreported, venue for fraud. The True the Vote initiative provides resources, instructions and the training to ensure that those Americans concerned enough to get actively involved in the election process, know their legal requirements and rights at the polling place.

Watching the voter fraud occurring in minority communities and hearing the horror stories of poll watcher witnesses, it is becoming rapidly apparent to this reporter that the majority of the judges and clerks within these communities in question have partisan ties to the Democratic Party. Read more…

Democratic Voter Fraud in Full Swing

November 1st, 2010 No comments

Voter Fraud in Full SwingAs the NIP has reported the Democrats have a long history of relying on voter fraud, and we expect this election to dramatically escalate.  Earlier this year after a whistleblower reported possible electronic manipulation 10,000 voting machines burned up in a warehouse in Texas before they could be examined.

In the 2008 election 43,000 false registrations were manufactured by ACORN enabling Al Franken to win by only 225 votes, thereby giving control of the Senate to Democrats and paving the way to socialist takeover of American healthcare.

Already in this election we are seeing signs of massive voter fraud across the country. In South Carolina a voter reported that even with election staff assistance his 4 attempts to vote straight Republican resulted in a straight Democratic ticket:

Sam Laughinghouse of New Bern said he pushed the button to vote Republican in all races, but the voting machine screen displayed a ballot with all Democrats checked. He cleared the screen and tried again with the same result, he said. Then he asked for and received help from election staff.

“They pushed it twice and the same thing happened,” Laughinghouse said. “That was four times in a row. The fifth time they pushed it and the Republicans came up and I voted.” P. Christine Smith, Sun Journal

Las Vegas voters are discovering that local election officials have made their voting easier by having Harry Reid’s name pre-selected: Read more…